Let Music fill the air

Saturday, October 15, 2011

I simply hate Good byes.......

Today was the last day of work at the site I have been at for quite a while.  

It's not good when you get up and you feel like this guy because your job has become a drag.   You know its time for change.      
Leaving is sort of a double edged sword because there are people there that I really love and respect and  also a few who I am not crazy about.    So let's begin a new chapter in Julie's  book of life experiences.     This last day just crept up and as I drove to work this morning I thought how my route would be different.    A change of scenery is like putting in a fresh set of eyes.    I am up for that.     I wanted to get through this week and  just slip out the back door with little fanfare because well,  I am  sensitive and I have had my share of good-byes in the last 5 years and I don't like it at all.    Good bye deaths,  good bye marriage,  &  good bye friends who live far away and the visit never long enough.      Anyways,  I wonder something tonite.... Why do they call it a "GOOD"- BYE ?      Really?  What's so good about it?  In any of the situations I just mentioned - they were not good.  They are emotional.     For me,  good-bye is reserved for the "I probably won't see you for a while"   kind of situation.    Always it's someone I have enjoyed spending time with and I don't really want to say good bye.    But life calls the shots - and I don't think it ever gets easier.    Something in my head keeps saying "fork in the road".....

    So, anyways  I consult the Urban Dictionary for an answer to why the good in the good-bye. 

Firstly it says:  GOODBYE:  The second worst word in the human dictionary. ( I agree but wonder what the first worst is).
 It says it means leaving someone or something, and sometimes never seeing them again.    
Then it tells me that
In Portuguese it means "adeus"...
"Adeus meus amigos..." = "Goodbye my friends"
(why just mention Portuguese?   Every language has its good byes right?)
Urban Dictionary is not helping.
So I find quotes about good-byes under the google search engine.  Some of what I find is good. 
Every goodbye makes the next hello closer.   (Awe.  That's nice.  But does it?)

How lucky I am to have known someone who was so hard to say goodbye to.
(I am a softie so the word lucky here is over-rated.)    Lucky that I feel foolish when I cry in front of people because I can't swallow the lump in my throat?  -  If tears are a sign of devotion - then truly I am lucky to have met someone or many who have made such an impression.    In this I agree.

This evening was a good last day.   The people I worked with made sure in thier own special way -  and as much as I tried to avoid the tears, I couldn't.  
When I drove out of the underground parking and headed home on the highway I felt like a backpack of bricks had just been lifted off my shoulders.    The road home looked totally different.

I had gotten out of there alive and a new chapter was to begin.  
I have made some wonderful friends there.   This is not good-bye.


I felt  a little like the tree full of flowers that had lost a few petals in the battle when the winds came up  after working at the same place for so many years - and through so many changes in our department  but when I look behind me  I know I  still left  some color on the path.    

While I am thinking out loud here.   Mind if I say - 
(Excuse me)...  but girls at work can be real bitches sometimes. Where does it come from?   I think different work ethics,  jealousy, and a stressful work environment.     Men in the  workplace is good for the mix .  I think generally they don't get so carried away as the girls do.    They talk about hockey when we are talking about gossip.   Gossip is one thing - but gossip that is hurtful is another. It really is the difference between a great workplace and a not so great workplace.

I got a little bit of advice about my new site - and there are a lot of girls there too. 
But I love the freshness of it all.    I can practice being a fly on the wall.   I am not very good at it but alas I have learned alot of lessons of late.    

What do they say?  

"When one door closes another door opens; but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us

 Well,  I am stepping through.  

Feel free to be inspired to follow.

Love J.


wendy said...

Ah Julie...I love ya. Thank you for your beautiful words/comment on my blog. You made me feel good.

you're job I think ran it's course...time to move on. That's a good thing. don't want to get stagnent.
you need a place for new creativity and expression
YES women can be a drag to work with..I have much preferred working with me, as my more immediate bosses or co-workers. So much less Drama.

goodbye...well, there is good and bad there I guess.
but, if it is a GOOD bye, that is better then a BAD bye.
I think pretty much every situation I have had to say goodbye to..no matter how painful or crappy...there was an element of "good" there, that I'd miss.

Julius Ceasar: If a man were to know the end of his days business ere to come, it sufficeth that the day will end, and then the end be known. IF we meet again, welll then we'll smile. If not, then this PARTING was well made.

ha ha ha...no I am not a freaking genius. I have this written in a book where I SAVE thoughts/writings/stuff.....

and having had to say goodbye to you summer breeze girls was INDEED A GOOD bye. one of my best good byes ever, even though I cried.

and yes I'd love to go for a drive with you, with the top down, singing country songs at the top of our lungs, smoking "sticks" (as you said) ha ha, that sure made me laugh.
big hug my sweet #1 sista

wendy said...

I meant MEN (not me)
sheesh, I should proof read before hitting the post button.

I do ramble don't I

The Quintessential Magpie said...

I am wishing you all the best with this new life path. I loved what you said about leaving some color on the trees behind. You, my friend, leave color wherever you go! You do, you know.

I think this will be a good experience for you, but oh, how those people are going to miss you at your old job. They will miss you far more than you miss them. You are a jewel.

Love you much...


Sheila... who refuses to say "goodbye" but rather Hasta Luego... see you later. I guess I could add alligator to that! ;-)

The Quintessential Magpie said...

Actually it means "until later."

But I think the Spanish have better expressions than "goodbye."

Teresa said...

Sweet Jewels... you've been on my mind, too. Changes all around.. aye? This last year has really been something, hasn't it? I think "fresh" is the new beginning that so many of us need right now. I'm not changing professions, mind you... I love, love, love to make beaufitul things. And I have a new huge sewing room to work in - But it does feel like a new beginning for me too. So much drama in the last year.. Losing my mentor, gaining a stalker, introducing my son to his father, which thankfully has been a blessing...

Oh how I wish we could have a girls weekend! I'll take a massage, mani/pedi, and a facial please. And a full barrel of wine with that! Wouldn't that be the best medicine?

I will never forget the fun we had in St. Augustine! That cold black cannon!! At least you went for it! When did I lose my nerve?? Ha! I miss you and Claudie SO, SO MUCH! So when is the next world tour???? I can't miss the next one.

I hope you Love your new place! I Love You Bunches! So good to hear from you!

Big Hugs,

jeanne said...

Dear Julie, The girls went to bed and I just had to say hello and I love you. I have been on a blog break since Claudie, Deborah and Claudia arrived. We were up before daylight and home way after dark. for most of the last few days. CC came to visit yesterday and we have had a wonderful visit. However, you and Wendy were missing and that was sad. Our goodbyes this summer was so sad yet we had to be thankful for a week to share with some very special women that have blessed our lives.

Your post is a beautiful and a heartfelt expression of your deepest thoughts and feelings about letting go of the old and embracing the new. I wish you so much success in your new job. I have no doubt it will be another achievement in the way you measure your life's experiences. I think the way you see things is a very special way. Full of insight and positive thoughts with moments of regret and sadness that were inevitable. You are a survivor Julie and don't lose that thought in your very pretty head! I mean it.

I cant wait to read all about your new job and soon. It is a positive move in every way.

I miss you and love you,
Jeanne xoxoxo

Claudia said...

Ms J...
Well, like you, I had to say good bye too your sisters... What gems they all are. Each one unique and what a blessing to have met them all and got to spend one on one time with them.

They all love you and know you and I will have a blast very soon. I cant wait to get to meet you.

I love how the Hawaiians use the work Aloha -- for both hello and goodbye... a new journey whether to begin or end.

And... my all time favorite saying. "When you change the way you look at things, the THINGS you look at change." Dyer

Talk to you soon -- give me a call or email me and I will call you.


~CC Catherine said...

Hey Sweet Julie...I MISS YOU ROOMIE!

This post is the BOMB! I hear your heart beat in each word you scribe...

So many people can relate to this too Jewels! Women can truly be catty & horrible in gossip...remember the pic we saw at the Art Gallery Museum in Montreal...they were all sitting at the table with a different body part of a chicken in their hands representing what they were doing at the table??? CUTTING other people up with Gossip!!! That would have been a good pic to add at that point when you addressed hateful gossip involving women. HA!

But it's not funny, is it? It is hurtful and makes both personal and private life HXLL. :(

I'm glad for you that you're in the car taking a new road...and I can't wait to hear what you find there...and who you'll find there to add joy to your life. God has a way of doing that, I know you know that too! ;)

I'm PROUD of the decision you made to move on...it takes GUTS in this economy to stretch your Butterfly wings to find another Butterfly bush to mount upon! :) But...my prayer is that you find a POT of Gold somewhere in this rainbow of a new job!

This past weekend was great seeing Claudie, Jeanne, Deborah, and meeting Claudia...but our dear Sista #1 and Sista# 6 wasn't there...how we missed you both! But...we talked of both of you often...and in LOVE; not hate. :)

I love you sweetie! Let's TALK for real soon! Like on the phone! I'd love it if you have some time - just send me an email to my work address and we'll do it!

Hugs & LOVE & KISSES -

C'est moi Claudette said...

Ok it's not working.
I'm not starting over, I can't, I'm exhausted.
I'll call you. I'm waiting for you to text me back

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